Inspiring TEDx talk about native genius.
Description from the video:
For the last 31 years, Kristen has been researching questions about being human — and in particular, “How does one know what to be when they grow up?” Starting with herself as the primary subject, she has inquired through the lenses of psychology, business, religious traditions and the arts. She started her career as a CPA and software developer for Accenture and later completed advanced degrees in mythology and body-centered psychology. Since 1990, she has consulted with companies about the intersection of human thriving and organizational performance.
About TEDx, x = independently organized event
In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)
Jana Pochop sent me to this link about a week ago. And now the same quote pops up again in my tumblr dashboard thanks to flickrlovr. I probably need to read it every day. Except I should also make sure I don’t just read it, but actually do work!!! The first bit about the good taste and the gap is something I’ve experienced myself for a long time but hadn’t articulated this well, and it is so good to hear from someone that it just takes doing the work. Not that it’s easy, but that it is something you can DO.
I’ve been frustrated by music marketing websites that give advice something to the effect of, “In order to make it, you must be awesome. If you’re not awesome, don’t bother. If you’re awesome, here’s what to do…” Part of me felt foolish for looking at the marketing sites before having anything to market, but I think part of me needed to know before I ventured out blindly that there IS a path for supporting myself with music. It might be a long and rocky one, but it does exist and there are many examples of people navigating it successfully without going on American Idol. (Hey, I love that show, just not my path!)
So the questions that kept coming up again and again were, “Where are the websites, venues and outlets for people learning how to be awesome?! Do I have to lock myself in a dark closet for 10 years until I get good enough to show my face? What do I do exactly while I’m in there? Will I be too old when I get out? Can’t I come out and play before then?”
I’ve been writing songs for 10 years. 10 years!! Now, a big chunk of those years, I was not really writing songs, I was working in the corporate world, paying off student loans, learning other things. But still. 10 years is a long time. The last 3 years I have been putting a good deal more time into writing, between Rocky Mountain Song School and BerkleeMusic.com. I still don’t feel like I really have a back-pocket, signature song that I feel just awesome about. Either it’s there and I can’t do it justice musically yet, or I have it but I’m too blinded by insecurities to know which one it is, or I haven’t even written it yet! But I have to start somewhere. It’s ok to start somewhere! Things are always changing and evolving.
When I look back at the stories I wrote in grade school, I don’t say, “Oh man, these SUCK, I can’t believe I ever wrote anything this bad!” I say something more like, “Wow, this was pretty good for 5th grade, I had quite the imagination!” I think the thing is, when you’re younger, there’s a bit more of a standard in expectation, which is low, and somehow once you become an adult there’s this expectation of at least competence in pretty much everything you do? So we stick to doing the things we know how to do so we don’t look foolish. OK, change the “we” and “you” in those last two sentences to “I”, I know I’m at least talking for myself! But I have seen plenty of programs or people ready to support young artists, and not so many that are for college graduates. It’s frustrating when my human years of life experience don’t match up to my artist years of artistic experience in terms of looking for support from the greater population.
I think I need work more consciously to take the expectations off, both my own and what I’m afraid other people might expect of me, and allow myself to just do the work. Even if it’s awkward and ugly, even if I’m afraid of what people will think if I say I’ve been writing songs for 10 years and they hear my songs and think, or worse, say, “THAT is what you got from 10 years? Ugh. Don’t quit your day job!”
Let’s back up just a wee bit there to that part about me being afraid of what other people might expect of me. My logical mind knows that it’s just redonkulous to try and second guess what every person on the planet wants from me, not to mention be able to produce it, all at the same time for everybody! But dang if there isn’t some little part of me that sure wants to try, because it appears to be the safest path, and isn’t willing to get started until I’ve figured out HOW. I know how well that works out, the result is paralysis! What I really need to figure out how to do is allow myself to be a beginner right now, so that I can start working uninhibited, so I can look back at my work right now and say, “Wow, never mind my age in human years then, I was pretty good for a beginner.” I need to be OK with being a beginner and also not discount the 10 years that I have been beginning!
It is scary for me to even admit any of this, to own up to being a nervous mess in a public forum like a blog, even if not too many people are reading it. But like Ira Glass is saying, people don’t tell beginners about the gap, so here I am, standing up for the beginners, whatever your age is, even if that’s just me.
